~ Distance~

The weather for the past couple of days are CRAZY. It's so hot, sticky, and full of persperation! Although its enjoyable (compared to the cold burring winter), the hotness makes me not want to do anything in fear that i would get even more sweatier. But just listening to the thunder and watching the lightening kinda brings some comfort, as weird as it may sound. But the sound of rain brings some peace in my mind and , of course, a nice lil breeze :)

Lately, i've felt a little distant from my friends. And i can't say it's totally because of school and work. There's so many things on my mind that i think about when i'm alone which i prefer not to continuously think about but a lil desire in me to spend time alone. I guess this is reflection. I just feel so separated from the world and so alone. And during this time, i feel so unproductive.. pondering about things in the past that i should really forget about or jumping to conclusions of things yet to come. Just to many thoughts.

Besides that, i've come to realize something that i tend to do.. and i really regret after.. every SINGLE time! Have you ever get so frustrated about something that is out of your control, but get mad at others (i.e. love ones) to take out the frustration? Well, i can say i do. This past monday, i had class downtown and because of the TTC strike i was stuck downtown until 8pm (from 10am). As i was waiting for the subways to reopen, my frustration grew ( i think partial because of the hot weather too). Finally when my daddy decided to pick me up from my mommy's work place, i was taking my frustration out on him. I didn't really know why at the time i was just giving single answers to my dad or my lack of enthusiam, but i've come to realize that it was just stupidity and a waste of anger. i mean it was really no ones fault! I dunno.. i just pray that i can stop doing this and learn to be thankful for everything i have.

Time to hit the books.. my 2 new loves: Finance and Canadian economic history.. OOoooOOOOo.. hehe

luv ya alls,
ren ren

~ Behind Every LOVE..
is a GREAT story!~

I was in my bored state of mind again.. so i went to get my mommy a present for just being my mommy. This year, she's been so into the dancing craze. O.. not like the break dancing or hippy hop (can u imagine my mom doing that.. hehe) but the ballroom, waltz, tango.. etc. So i decided to get her some music so she can bop to. But its kinda embrassing (well to me) to ask the punkish looking guy at HMV "um.. do u know where i can find ballroom dancing music?" Worst is them give u the weird look and contemplating himself where it would be.. hehe. Well, they didnt' have any, but i ended buying Notebook (the movie) since it was on sale.. and it was SO good the first time i watched it! Hence, i went home and started to watching it on my computer. It's really touching. For those who haven't watched it, you should (i wont' tell you to spoil it! - hmmm but skip the rest of this paragraph though). It is hard to grasp the idea that someone can LOVE someone else so much (well on earth i mean). However, it does make my heart sink (in a good way of course) that Noah can love Allie so much that he built her dream house for her even after breaking up and waiting 10 years for her. Also having him read to her their story EVERYDAY because she can't remember anything. I think it would be devastating to forget the ones you love and care so much.. and worst is to have a love one forget about you! Yes, i teared up near the ending (although my brother made me pause it at the MOST sobing part b/c he need the computer)! It made me think.. what IF someone i love forgot about me? Would i have the strength to do what noah did?
Something else i learned from watching this (again) is that love (= passion) does give enormous strength for a person and hence does great things for this world. This year i can honestly say i've meant a lot of passionate people.. and i feel so honored! They not only make me feel so loved (through support and care), but i also set them as my role model and they make me want to strive for more in life.
Tomorrow i'll be doin the 30 hr famine. I have my fingers crossed and please pray because if u know me.. i have a great love for food. I'll update all on my progress!

Luv ya all,
ren ren

Finished.. Done.. "joe yun".. fin.. finito.. over

I can seriously say that i'm finished COMPLETELY! No more exams and classes.. well at least for another couple of days. Although i've been resting (i.e. doing competely nothing at home), it seems like months that i haven't been at school. For some reason i always feel like I want to go back to school when i'm not in and want out when i'm actually am in school (does that make sense??). I think the reason is because i'm totally NOT doing anything (i.e. so UNproductive!)Well that would end soon.. because summer school is about to start!

Well, i went out to chill with some of my friends over the past couple of days and its been SO much fun. It feels like ages since we could sit.. relax.. talk.. or completely do NOTHING! (BUt beware.. too much of nothing is NOT good :)) A couple of my uni friends and i are planning a trip to LAS VEGAS at the end of August.. the place of casinos! (although i'm the most RISK ADVERSE person EVER!)But i haven't been and i want to go somewhere this summer! However the problem arises when i went to pay my tuition of summer school (which i did just a couple hours ago because i TOTALLY forgot its due in 2 days.. hehe.. that's me!) and i've come to a realization that i dont' have a lot of money left! This is sad. And i've taken 3 weeks off of work for exams and relaxation. Time to get on some job searching.. so i can ACTUALLY go somewhere this summer!

But... i'm SO happy.. because WE(most of u and moi) have finished 3 years of uni! that means 1 more year to go.. (for most of us).. CONGRATS! pat yourself on the back and celebrate.. because it sure is hard work! Hopefully next year would be as splendid!

Well on another note, the other day i was watching mr. DR. PHIL! It was about this mother that would beat/harass/verbally & physically abuse her children. i was watching a clip.. and i was literally in tears! How can a mother lay hands on a creation she made??? it really boggles my mind! it's outragous! One her kids were limping b/c the beating was that bad.. and when the son told his mom about the pain.. she would just kick him on the butt and bully him! How is this possible! AFter i watched this.. i've come to realize that i am SO blessed to have such a GREAT mommy! I dont' know if i can every be such a great mom.. its indescribable! Also, i was watching this new show on TLC (YES, i watch a lot of tv when i have time) called Shalom in the House (or something like that). The main man was saying something about being a child. Being a child is not about blood and DNA.. its someone that is given UNCONDITIONAL love! (or something like that.. well that's what i interpret it to mean!).. i thought it was so true. I can truly say that i've been given that unconditional love (from my parents and God.. and some of my friends.. THX!)I'm truely blessed! THX.. to all.. and u know who u are.. THX to u whose reading this too! :) When u ever feel a little down.. know that YOU are LOVED unconditionally!

WEll .. this weekend is MOTHER's DAY.. so take little time out of your day and tell her how much she means to you and show her! A little hug.. a little kiss.. taking her out for lunch.. making her something.. flowers.. ANYTHING! It's not shown by how much or big it is.. its the thoughtfulness! So remember! so HAPPY mother's day to all the mommies in the world!

and.. CONGRATS to all those that's completed another year of uni/college! Your almost there.. and all your hard work will pay off! i PROMISE you!
Take care EVERYONE!
luv muches,
ren ren